Many people who are accused of sex crimes, specifically when the other person says that they didn’t have consent, claim that they just didn’t know how to ask for it in the heat of the moment. They weren’t sure what to say or what to do. They just tried to interpret the situation.
This can lead to a tragic situation for all involved. The other person feels that they’ve been wronged, but the person accused of the crime doesn’t feel like they intentionally did anything that was illegal. They never meant for this to happen. So how can you ask for consent?
Be as direct as you can
The key thing to remember is just to be direct. Say what you would like to do and ask for permission. If that person gives it to you freely and happily, then you have consent and you don’t really need to worry about it. They could withdraw their consent later, so always pay attention to what they’re telling you, but getting it upfront can take all the stress out of the situation.
Be wary of someone who says yes but doesn’t really look like they mean it. Maybe they seem nervous. Maybe they’re unsure, but they eventually say yes. You can still run into problems with situations like these, and there are those who say that you still don’t have consent if you get it under these conditions. That person could claim that they were scared or pressured. You need to make sure that you have direct consent and that there’s no question about it in your mind.
If you do all of this and you still find yourself facing serious criminal charges for an alleged sexual offense, make sure you know exactly what criminal defense options you have.